'A masterclass in how not to get hired': 18-year-old writes unflattering pitch for themself on social media job page

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Nov 9, 2024 3:00 PM EST

This person is young and aspirational, but their methods of finding a new job could use some fine-tuning. 

Creating your very first resume is both intimidating and kind of embarrassing. Because you have zero job experience, you have to write about the clubs you participated in school, or your hobbies where you have leadership qualities, or even just the classes you're currently taking. None of that life experience is going to wow a hiring manager. But that's why kids start small, picking up jobs at fast food chains or clothing stores and working for minimum wage. 

This 18-year-old had a different idea of how they think their first jobs should go. They wrote in to a Facebook group for job offerings with an interesting paragraph about their own experience. Instead of highlighting their best attributes, they insisted on avoiding jobs where they have to work with customers (even though they claim to be outgoing in the same breath). The internet found this all very funny, and had some notes for this kid about better ways to find a job. 

Up next, have a laugh at some employees who got fired after getting petty with their most entitled customers, like one who informed a customer that, "If I have to talk to you again, you have to sit in time-out for 10 minutes."

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10426122496
    via Hannah Busing on Unsplash+

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    Posted this on r/choosingbeggars, and was told you guys might enjoy it. A masterclass in how NOT to get hired.
    via u/Toffbags
  • 03
    Jobs k,offered and wanted I'm 18 years old and didn't finish college because of lockdown so I need a job. I failed all my GCSEs but I got into college and am studying Art and Media for A Level and I haven't finished yet but I would have passed so it counts.
    via u/Toffbags
  • 04
    I was a bit of a legend in school and am very outgoing so I think I'll fit in well at any workplace, I want some boys to have a laugh with and go for drinks with after work.
    via u/Toffbags
  • 05
    I don't want any job that involves customers, I can't deal with r de idiots. I'd much prefer a part time office job or something to get my Mum off my back. I won't lower myself to minimum wage so make sure it's decent pay thanks.
    via u/Toffbags
  • 06
    MackieJ667 It's good to have (reasonable) preferences but be nice about it. Geez.
    via u/MackieJ667
  • 07
    eljeffersano Is there any good way to phrase "was a bit of a legend at school" professionally for a resume? Asking for a friend
    via u/eljeffersano
  • 08
    piscespost So, is the GSCE is the British equivalent of a high school diploma....? Also, omg.
    via u/piscespost
  • 09
    ZCYNICALifornia HR departments everywhere are grateful to her for making their decision to hire her easy.
    via u/ZCYNICALifornia
  • 10
    Pill Cosby_87 Haven't finished it yet but it still counts. Well in that case...I applied for college so I'm theoretically a doctor and will be addressed as one from this point forward. Will work for no less than mid six figures, annual bonuses plus commission. Thank you for reading (not really though).
    via u/Pill Cosby_87
  • 11
    eevee03tv What's worse is now he has publicly broadcast he is a bad candidate to all future employers even if he - shapes up next time.
    via u/eevee03tv
  • 12
    calladus He's on unemployment and he needs to show that he made an effort to get a job this week.
    via u/calladus
  • 13
    [deleted] Oh this sweet summer child
    via u/[deleted]
  • 14
    [deleted] If this works, I've been doing this wrong for Years!
    via u/[deleted]
  • 15
    tehfreek I can't deal with r de idiots. Neither can your future co- workers, m'boy!
    via u/tehfreek
  • 16
    LivyKitty2332 I remember being 16 and being so upset no one would hire me, not even fast food, cuz I didn't have any prior skills. Seeing people post "won't work minimum wage" makes my head hurt.
    via u/LivyKitty2332

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